Some of you may be wondering, “The Padres’ season is over. What the Hell are you going to do now, Ghost? In-depth analysis of Mighty Wings sales? The history of the McNugget?”
To be honest, I wondered the same thing. Quite frankly, I’d love to take a break. But for some reason you people keep coming back. And I don’t want to disappoint any more than I already have.
We have some interesting ideas for the offseason that Padres Public will be rolling out over the course of the next month or so, but I figured I’d start with one of mine right away.
Say hello to the first of many polls to choose the first ever McRib Awards.
Over the course of the next few weeks, I’ll be leaving it up to you, my loyal readers, to select the winners in each category. Then I’ll have one post to announce them all at once. Just like the Academy Awards, but completely different, because the winners get nothing. Nothing at all. Unless you count bragging rights. And who would really brag about this?
Instead of categories like “Best Starter” or “Team MVP,” which every blog, sports website, network, guy/gal on the street, and family pet out there already does, I’m going to throw out some unusual categories. This first one definitely qualifies:
We’re going to pick the best Padres meme of 2013.
The only rules:
- It had to be a hashtag-able meme. So, Kelly Crull constantly getting drenched with Powerade after walk-off wins doesn’t count.
- It had to have caught on since the end of the 2012 season. So you will not see #VedderCup, #MowMyLawn, #dickhats, or #Dickisms among the nominees.
- #PPLive was not eligible, obviously. That would be unfair to all the other nominees. Because it’s the greatest hashtag in the history of hashtags!
This is where we gather from time to time to talk about something big in the Padres world or just the Padres or just baseball. It’s a roundtable discussion. Except, you know, no round tables. This is a Public House…so we’re at the bar.
Over the course of human history, there have been many epic battles.
- 480 B.C. – Thermopylae
- 1066 A.D. – Hastings
- 1588 – Defeat of the Spanish Armada
- 1815 – Waterloo
- 1863 – Gettysburg
- 1985 – The Cola Wars
But these ALL pale in comparison to what we will witness tonight, in Chicago at Wrigley Field, when Anthony Rizzo steps into the batter’s box to face down Andrew Cashner.
So, without further ado, we bring you…
Jason Marquis took the bump on a windy Los Angeles evening and absolutely stuck it to the Dodgers. I make it sound like it happened long ago, in another time, another place, but it was actually last night. Man does it feel weird to type those words.
Jason Marquis was great last night. He struck out 5, gave up 3 hits, and only walked 1 batter while (perhaps most importantly) pitching into the 8th inning. He even retired the order 1-2-3 in the 1st inning which I don’t think had happened yet in 2013.
After making it through two outs in the 8th, Marquis gave way to Andrew Cashner who needed 67 pitches (7 actually) to retire Mark Ellis on a long fly ball to LF. And that’s what this is really about. It’s about Andrew Cashner and his ability to pump fastballs at high speeds. It’s about Andrew Cashner making things exciting, but also interesting (in a bad way). It’s about Andrew Cashner dressing the deer.
In the interest of full disclosure, I was drinking last night. So all of this made sense to me in the moment. Today? Eh, I think it still does.