10 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Tyson Ross…Because I Made Them Up

UTI1783095_t837Starting pitcher Tyson Ross improved upon the success of his 2013 Padres debut with an NL All-Star appearance selection in 2014. As a key member of the Padres rotation, fans are looking for more big things from Ross in 2015.

Inspired by a new Friarwire feature by Bill Center, here are ten things you probably didn’t know about Ross. And you didn’t know them because they are totally not true. I completely made them up. If you believe that they could be even remotely factual, that’s your problem. Because as far as I know — I did no research — they are not at all.

  • Ross was the North Coast Repertory Theater’s “Performer to Watch” for his 2013 performance as Puck in William Shakespeare’s “Midsummer Night’s Dream.”
  • Ross was a two-time member of the All-Pac-10 Tiddlywinks team while at the University of California Berkeley.
  • Ross breaks into the San Diego Zoo and wrestles the giant pandas in the offseason to keep himself in shape.
  • Ross is a fully-certified volcanologist.
  • Ross threw a Major League-leading 1,272 sliders in the 2014 season according to Baseball Prospectus. His slider is expected to spawn another two parody Twitter accounts in 2015.
  • While a student at Cal, Ross was a volunteer subject of numerous tests on psychic ability.
  • Rival batters are hitting only when Ross allows them to.
  • Younger brother Joe Ross was the first-round pick (25th overall) of the Padres in the 2011 draft. Tyson held Joe down and tickled him until Joe cried during a Christmas trip home in the 2013-14 offseason.
  • Ross has been known to sleepwalk. Numerous times in the Oakland A’s minor league system, he was found in the middle of the night cooking Thanksgiving dinner and driving the team bus to local fast food restaurants. He does not remember ever doing these things.
  • While Ross’ slider is becoming the stuff of legend, little attention is paid to his eephus pitch, which has been known to bend space and time.

There you have it. Ten completely made up things about Tyson Ross. Again, if you believe that any of them are even remotely true, it’s purely coincidental.

I write something for Padres Public just about every week (during the season) and usually on Wednesday morning.  Since you’re likely already following me on Twitter, tell your friends, family, and well-wishers to follow me.  Give CornfedFriar a follow while you’re at it.

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