Last Friday Geoff Young provided a survival guide for Padres fans living in Time Warner territory. I liked some of Geoff’s suggestions, but truth be told, I hate Time Warner with such extreme prejudice that the opportunity to stick it to that miserable company is just too good to pass up. So yesterday I finally did it: I called AT&T to set up U-Verse and bring FSN San Diego to my humble home. This year I’ll be providing misinformed opinions about the Padres after having actually watched the games!
Claims that the process of switching cable providers is a hassle are unsubstantiated thus far (and I’ve likely just jinxed myself). I won’t know for certain until Friday if this was the biggest mistake of my life but up until now, Part 1 of the switch has gone swimmingly.
Where to begin, ah yes. I received a letter from AT&T U-verse a few weeks back and I kept it visible on the kitchen counter with the express intent of making the switch. I imagine everyone in Time Warner country received the same letter offering a 6 month deal for $29/month + Total Home DVR Included + Free Professional Installation. A priority code for my residence was included with an expiration date of April 13th, 2013. The letter was warmly addressed to “Our Neighbor”.
Awwww, they had me at Our.
Step 1: Call Telephone Number
The number I called was 1-877-943-0685. The menu provided an option for customers with and without a priority code. So, yeah . . . go ahead and use this phone number.
Step 2: Ask Questions
I knew that this offer was for Basic Cable so I needed to inquire about an immediate upgrade. I told Rebecca . . . oh I’m sorry, Rebecca was the associate who helped me. She asked my day and the weather. I told her the weather in San Diego today was perfect, which it was.
Then I asked her a question. “How’s your weather?”
Rebecca responded with laughter, “I’m in upstate New York.”
I laughed and took her response as, “I’m going to be as polite as possible for the duration of this phone call but seriously, f*ck you and Shangri-La.”
Having built rapport with Rebecca I began asking more questions.
“I can get FSN San Diego, right?”. Rebecca said, “Yes.”
I said, “I need a lot of channels because TV is important. Can I get more channels?” Rebecca told me that she would give me the U-200 TV Package.
I should have asked what the U-200 package entailed other than 200 channels but I didn’t. I only asked how much it would cost. “How much does this cost, Rebecca?”
Rebecca told me it would be $81.99/month. Since this was a lot cheaper than what I currently pay with Time Warner, I merely squealed like a pig in sh*t. Rebecca took this as tacit acceptance of AT&T’s terms.
I should have asked if this was a 6-month deal, and if so, what the price would jump to at the expiration of the term. I didn’t ask. I was too giddy.
I then asked if I could get internet as part of the deal. She said yes and told me that the internet was included in the $81.99.
Is it wireless? Crap . . .
Then I asked Rebecca if I was required to get telephone service with a conversion to AT&T and she said no. I’m amazed that the answer to this question was no, but who am I to argue.
What else is there?
Step 3: Make Appointment
I figured I would get screwed on this one. I asked for Wednesday or Thursday of this week but figured I’d get Monday, April 8th or some other bull-crap time.
Rebecca informed me that they could send someone on Friday between 1pm and 3pm. What? By the end of the week? Only a 2 hour window for your technician and not 8 hours?
I said, “Perfect! Despite my obvious excitement, I’ll be eagerly waiting Friday March 29th at 1pm with all of my clothes on! See you then Rebecca!*”
Rebecca said that someone would be at my home on Friday. But that it would not be her.
Will AT&T honor the two hour window? Will Time Warner free me from the yoke of their power without financial repercussions?
Stay tuned and I’ll let you know how things go Friday afternoon.
Read Part 2 here.
I contribute to Padres Public on Thursday mornings and when I’m feeling particularly inspired. I can also be found on twitter at @AvengingJM where I offer bite size chunks of fiber-optics 7 days a week.